CPS Gets Involved As Woman Refuses To Let 9YO Sister Go Illiterate Over Parents’ Odd Beliefs

It starts the way a lot of family crises start: not with sirens, but with a sinking feeling. A woman realizes her 9-year-old sister can’t read. Not “struggles with chapter books” can’t readmore like “can’t sound out cat” can’t read. The parents insist it’s fine. They have “beliefs.” School is “brainwashing.” Books “steal imagination.” Letters are… suspicious, apparently.

So the older sister does what a surprising number of adults are terrified to do: she refuses to look away. She asks hard questions. She calls people who can help. And eventually, CPS gets involvedbecause in the United States, a child’s right to an education isn’t just a nice idea. In many places, it’s a legal expectation.

This article isn’t about dunking on homeschooling (done well, it can be excellent). It’s about the line between “alternative education” and “no education.” It’s about what educational neglect can look like, what usually happens when Child Protective Services is contacted, and how families can move from panic and conflict to something that looks a lot like hopeplus a library card.

Note: This is general information, not legal advice. Education and child welfare rules vary by state and county.

The uncomfortable question: Is this “just homeschooling,” or is it educational neglect?

In the U.S., families can often choose public school, private school, charter school, or homeschooling. That flexibility is a featurenot a bug. But the flexibility isn’t supposed to mean a child can be left functionally illiterate with no plan, no instruction, and no progress while adults insist “it’ll happen naturally.”

Homeschooling can be greatwhen it’s actually school

Real homeschooling usually includes some combination of:

• Regular instruction (reading, writing, mathat a minimum)
• A curriculum (structured or eclectic)
• Work samples, assessments, portfolios, or required reporting (depending on the state)
• Evidence the child is learning and developing skills over time

Educational neglect, on the other hand, can include things like failing to enroll a child in any schooling option, allowing chronic truancy, or refusing necessary educational servicesespecially when a child is clearly falling behind and the adults responsible won’t cooperate with solutions.

In plain English: if a child is being “homeschooled” in theory but receives little or no education in reality, the label doesn’t magically make it okay.

What the law generally expects: compulsory education (with state-by-state wrinkles)

Here’s the frustrating-but-important truth: the U.S. doesn’t have one single nationwide “school rule.” Each state sets compulsory attendance ages and defines what counts as an acceptable education program. But there’s still a common theme: kids are typically required to be in school (or an equivalent program) for a range of years.

Compulsory school ages vary, but the expectation is real

Some states start required attendance as early as age 5 or 6, while others start at 7 or 8. The upper end also varies. Translation: a 9-year-old is almost always within the compulsory education window.

Even where homeschooling is legal and common, it’s typically expected to be “equivalent instruction” in some form. Some states require notification to a district, some require subjects to be taught, and some require testing or evaluationswhile others are far less hands-on.

“Odd beliefs” don’t erase a child’s needs

Parents can hold all kinds of beliefs about education: religious objections, distrust of institutions, philosophies like unschooling, or fears about bullying and safety. Some concerns are understandable. But the child still needs basic skills. Reading isn’t optional in modern lifeit’s how you access healthcare instructions, job applications, and the ability to advocate for yourself.

If a belief system results in a child being denied the chance to learn to readespecially with no credible plan to teach literacyprofessionals may view it as a serious welfare concern.

How CPS typically gets involved (and what it canand can’tdo)

“CPS” is a common shorthand, but the agency name varies: Department of Children and Families, Child Protective Services, Family Services, Human Servicesyou get the idea. The process varies too, but many jurisdictions follow a similar flow.

Step 1: A report is made

A report can come from many sources: a concerned relative, a neighbor, a school employee, a pediatrician, or a therapist. In many states, certain professionals are mandated reporters, meaning they must report suspected abuse or neglect.

Step 2: Screening and triage

Not every call becomes a full investigation. Agencies screen reports to decide whether the situation fits legal definitions of abuse/neglect and whether there’s enough information to act. Educational concerns can be tricky, because sometimes the “front door” is the school attendance system or a truancy processnot child welfare. But when the issue is severe and tied to caregiver decisions (not just a kid skipping class), it can rise to the level of neglect in some places.

Step 3: Investigation or assessment

If the report is accepted, a caseworker may interview the child, parents/guardians, and sometimes other relatives or professionals. They might ask about:

• School enrollment status and attendance history
• Homeschool documentation (if applicable)
• The child’s academic functioning (can they read? write? do basic math?)
• Any special education needs or learning concerns
• Broader safety factors (supervision, medical care, living conditions)

The goal in many cases is not “punishment.” It’s correctiongetting the child into an educational environment that actually teaches them.

Step 4: Services, plans, and sometimes court involvement

Many cases end with a service plan: enrolling the child, providing tutoring, ensuring evaluations, requiring attendance, or connecting the family to resources. If parents refuse, a court can sometimes become involvedespecially if the child’s needs are being persistently ignored.

Important nuance: CPS powers and thresholds vary widely by state and county. Some areas treat educational neglect aggressively; others route most education problems through truancy systems first. But when a 9-year-old can’t read and caregivers block help, professionals tend to take that seriously.

Why illiteracy at nine is a big deal (and still fixable)

By around third or fourth grade, many kids shift from “learning to read” to “reading to learn.” That doesn’t mean all children must hit identical milestones at identical ages. Plenty of kids need extra time or different instruction. But when a child reaches 9 and still can’t decode simple words, it usually signals a gap in instruction, an undiagnosed learning difference (like dyslexia), limited access to books, chronic absence, orsometimeseducational neglect.

What’s at stake (beyond report cards)

Reading is connected to almost every part of a child’s world:

• Confidence: Kids quickly notice when peers can do something they can’t.
• Safety: Reading warnings, labels, and basic instructions matters.
• Opportunity: Literacy affects long-term education and job options.
• Mental health: Chronic academic stress can fuel anxiety and behavioral issues.

The good news: with effective instruction, many children can make rapid progresseven after years of falling behind. The earlier you intervene, the better. But “earlier” is a moving target. Nine is not too late. Nine is a rescue mission with a very achievable win condition.

What the older sister did right (and what you can do, too)

If you’re the adult sibling in this situation, you’re basically trying to be a lifeguard while your family argues about whether water is a government conspiracy. It’s exhausting. It’s emotional. And it often requires strategy.

1) Keep the focus on the child, not the ideology

Arguing “your beliefs are weird” rarely changes minds. Saying “she can’t read and that puts her at risk” keeps the conversation anchored to the child’s needs.

2) Gather specific observations (not vibes)

Instead of “she seems behind,” you want details:

• Can she identify letters?
• Can she write her name?
• Can she read simple words (cat, bed, sun)?
• What happens when she triesdoes she guess, avoid, melt down?

Specifics help professionals understand urgency. They also make it harder for adults to wave things away with “she’s fine.”

3) Try a “least escalatory” path firstwhile still having a line in the sand

In some families, starting with a pediatrician visit or an educational evaluation is the fastest route to reality. A neutral professional can say, kindly but clearly: “This child needs structured reading instruction.”

If the parents refuse all evaluations and all instruction? That’s often when relatives consider a reportbecause refusal becomes part of the problem.

4) Offer practical alternatives (so parents can save face)

Some parents resist school because they fear losing control or being judged. Options that sometimes lower defensiveness:

• A state-approved homeschool plan with a clear curriculum
• Part-time enrollment or online public school programs (where available)
• Reading tutoring 2–3 times per week
• Library programs and structured literacy resources

The goal is literacy and safetynot “winning” an argument.

A catch-up plan that actually works: from “stuck” to “reading”

If a 9-year-old is functionally illiterate, the most reliable approach is usually structured literacyexplicit, systematic teaching of how letters and sounds work, how to blend sounds into words, and how to build fluency and comprehension step by step.

Start with decoding (the missing tool, not the missing effort)

Many struggling readers aren’t “lazy.” They’re missing a method. A simple starter routine might look like:

1. 10 minutes: Letter-sound practice (short vowels, common consonants)
2. 10 minutes: Blending practice with decodable words (cat, ship, stone)
3. 10 minutes: Read a decodable text and re-read for fluency
4. 5 minutes: Talk about what the story meant (comprehension grows here)

Short, consistent sessions beat occasional marathon “catch-up” days. Kids learn reading the way you learn guitar: daily practice, not one heroic weekend.

Screen for learning differences early

If the child has dyslexia or another learning difference, the right instruction matters even more. An evaluation (through a school district, psychologist, or qualified specialist) can identify needs and guide support.

Make books emotionally safe again

Kids who feel ashamed often avoid reading. Build a shame-free environment:

• Let them choose high-interest, low-reading-level books
• Use audiobooks alongside print (it builds vocabulary and confidence)
• Celebrate progress like it’s a sport (because it kind of is)

How to talk to parents who think school is “the enemy”

When parents have rigid beliefs, logic alone may not move them. But values-based communication sometimes can.

Lead with shared values

Try: “I know you want her to be independent and not controlled by anyone. Reading is a tool of independence. Without it, she’ll be controlled by whoever can read for her.”

Offer a “belief-compatible” solution

Parents who fear institutions may still accept:

• A homeschool curriculum with measurable milestones
• A tutor they can interview and approve
• A co-op with other homeschool families
• A written plan that proves the child is learning

If the parents won’t accept any solution, the issue stops being educational philosophy and starts being child welfare.

If CPS is already involved: how to protect the child emotionally

CPS involvement can be scary for adults and confusing for kids. The child may worry they “caused trouble” or that they’ll be separated from their family. If you’re the supportive sibling, your role is part advocate, part translator, part calm anchor.

What helps the child most

• Predictability: Consistent routines, consistent adults, consistent messages.
• Reassurance: “Grown-ups are fixing a grown-up problem. You’re not in trouble.”
• Privacy: Don’t turn the child into the family gossip headline.
• Skill-building: Every reading session is both education and healing.

It’s also okay to name the truth gently: “You deserved help sooner. We’re getting it now.”

Conclusion: Literacy is not a lifestyle preference

Families can disagree about a lot: screen time, bedtime, whether broccoli is a conspiracy. But literacy isn’t a quirky add-on. It’s a protective factor that affects a child’s safety, confidence, and future. When a caregiver’s beliefs prevent a child from learning to readand block all reasonable helpsystems like truancy enforcement, schools, and sometimes CPS may step in.

If you’re the older sibling who sounded the alarm, you may feel like the “bad guy” in family group chats for a while. But in the long run, you’re the person who refused to let a child’s world shrink down to what other people are willing to read aloud for her.

And if you need a motto for the hard days, try this: Love is not silence. Love is showing upwith phonics.

Experiences related to this topic: what people often learn the hard way (and wish they’d known sooner)

The most common “experience” shared by adults who step in for a child isn’t a dramatic courtroom scene. It’s the slow realization that neglect can wear normal clothes. The house can look tidy. The parents can sound confident. The child can be polite and quiet. And yetwhen you hand the kid a birthday card and ask what it says, they stare at the paper like it’s written in invisible ink.

One frequent pattern: the child becomes an expert at hiding the gap. People describe 8- to 10-year-olds who memorize signs, logos, and routines to avoid reading. They recognize the cereal box, the streaming app icon, the “play” button, and the shape of their own name. In public, they’ll laugh it off“I forgot my glasses!”even though they don’t own glasses. At home, they may ask a sibling to “help” with simple tasks that should be independent by that age. The moment you notice the pattern, you also notice the child’s constant vigilance: they’re managing embarrassment every day.

Another common experience: the first reading breakthrough can be emotional. Adults who tutor children in this situation often describe a day when the child finally blends sounds into a wordreally blends, not guessesand then pauses like something huge just happened. Because it did. For a kid who’s been living in a world of guesswork, decoding is like someone switching on the lights. You may see excitement, relief, or even anger: “Why didn’t anyone teach me this?” That reaction isn’t disrespect; it’s grief for lost time.

Family resistance is also predictable. Concerned relatives often say they tried to “keep it calm,” offered tutoring, bought books, suggested an evaluation, and still got shut down. The pushback can come wrapped in moral language (“We’re protecting her”), political language (“We don’t trust the system”), or spiritual language (“We’re called to do it this way”). The experience many advocates share is that you don’t have to win an argument about ideology to protect a child. You have to document the educational reality and offer concrete solutions. If every solution is rejected, the refusal becomes part of the story.

Professionals often describe a “missing allies” problem. Children in school are seen by mandated reportersteachers, counselors, nurseswho may notice learning delays or neglect. When a child is isolated from school and community programs, there are fewer outside eyes to notice what’s wrong. That’s why relatives, coaches, neighbors, librarians, and pediatricians can become unexpectedly important. People who’ve been through this often say the turning point was finding one calm professional who took it seriously and explained options clearly: an intake worker, a school social worker, or a literacy specialist who could say, “This is teachable. Here’s the plan.”

Finally, many advocates talk about the emotional aftermath. Even when the child starts receiving help, family relationships may remain tense. The older sibling may be blamed for “betrayal,” and the child may feel caught between loyalty and relief. People who navigate this well tend to separate two things: (1) the child’s need for safe education, and (2) the adults’ feelings about being challenged. The first is urgent and non-negotiable. The second can be addressed laterpreferably with support, boundaries, and maybe a therapist who doesn’t flinch when someone says, “We don’t believe in reading.”

The experience most people carry forward is simple: intervention is messy, but illiteracy is a heavier lifelong burden. When you choose the messy path now, you’re choosing a bigger, freer future for the child.